Cambodia – Rats and Dreams and Stuff

Cambodia!

After a 32 hour bus ride and getting denied at the border then taking an unplanned flight to Cambodia, we made it! First impressions… flat, dry and hot. The first night our ministry host took us out for dinner and it was actually one of the best meals I’ve had on the race. It was beef and veggies cooked on this grill with broth. Accidentally ate pigs blood though. Thought it was tofu lol.

The Rat House

We heard stories about there being rats in this house. But after 15 minutes, I came across 3 rats in the rooms upstairs. Mind you, my leader is deathly afraid of rats. So we all slept on the floor downstairs. One ran past Natalie while she was in the bathroom and all hell broke loose. Three people were standing on the counter within seconds. The bathroom was outlawed for a full 15 hours. A few days later we sprung into action and bought rat traps then found 8 dead rats, that we had Bill exterminate for us.

Week 1 – Grade 1

We have been teaching at Good Seed School and the first week I was in the first grade class. I fell so in love with these kids, but my heart also broke for them in many ways. Because of the effects of the Khmer Rouge, it has caused these kids to feel an immense amount of pressure to preform well in school. They are trying to make up for the loss, but in the process they are becoming enslaved to the spirit of performance. Most times when I’m just sitting in class, I’ll just pray over the kids and teachers to encounter the Lords love and freedom.

A School Day

In addition to teaching in the morning and the evening, we’ve been in the process of painting a mural. Every time we get to the school the kids will come running to give us hugs. The way they approach me, is how I want to approach the Lord. They have taught me more about the Lords love than I could ever teach them. They always call us “teacha!! teacha!!“ but they’re the real teachers out here. Sometimes I’ll just be painting and a few girls will just come sit by me and want nothing more than to be in my presence. What a reflection of Gods character.

Dreams and Visions

So there’s a few things. First off, there’s been separate occasions that I’ve woken up in tears from my dreams. I’ve felt like I’ve been spiritually attacked during my sleep a few times. Basically, I’ve had dreams of me doing terrible things and waking up feeling so guilty. I think a part of it is also being in a culture of shame and honor. I’ve seen the kids walking in a lot of shame and timidity and as my heart broke for them, I found myself approaching God with timidity. But then God reminded me of when I was a kid, me and my sister would just say “I rebuke you in Jesus name” in the middle of the night if we had bad dreams. I realized I have authority to put an end to this. So I rebuked guilt and shame that the enemy attempted to put on me. God won me over with honor. You are not exempt from that either. YOU are clothed in honor in Gods kingdom.

Secondly, during one of my morning classes. This little girl started telling me about demons she saw in her house. She’s had visions of Jesus in the clouds and Him fighting demons. She’s only 7 years old. I know God is using her for the kingdom, but she is battling a lot of darkness right now. She kept saying “my family doesn’t know Jesus YET”. She knows they will come to know Jesus. I could use the same faith for my brother. Speaking of, I also had a sad dream about him and proceeded to cry for hours because he doesn’t have a relationship with Jesus. Pray that my brother has an encounter with the Lord.

Boats, Snakes and Sticks

Bill (our squad leader) came for a visit one weekend. While he also exterminated rats, he visited our ministry hosts home town. We drove in the back of an old Hyundai truck through some rice fields and dirt to a small village. And by village I mean like 3 houses. And by houses I mean like some sticks. It’s crazy to me that people live with next to nothing. They just feed off the animals around them. Like snakes and birds. So that’s what we ate. I ate snake and the egg inside of it, and intestines. It was… interesting. But then we rod a fishing boat to open waters to swim. Got some of the dirt from the drive off. Then got back in the truck, and got matted with dirt all over but worse because it was now in combination with being wet. Life was at its peak. Genuinely. Even when our only option for a shower was a bucket of water and the bidet in the squatty potty didn’t work, I’d felt dirtier than ever, I also felt happier than ever. So that was an adventure day. It was an adventure all right.

Silence and Solitude

A sabbath day on the other hand included silence and solitude. To be honest I felt like a monk to begin with, but once I got past that, 60 minutes was just an abyss that I had entered into at full speed.
My initial approach was to give God whatever thought or feeling I experienced. But the Lord gently redirected my efforts of giving to Him, into a position of receiving from Him. A humbling position.
First off, I was taken back to a memory of laying in the grass of the front yard of my childhood home. A time before the worries of this world weighed heavy on me. I began to cry because I missed home. I don’t mean my home now, I mean the feeling of safety and security. The Lord then showed me a picture of Him and I building a house together. As the Lord becomes my home, I will begin to invite people in. A place sheltered by His love.

Mommy’s Food

Let me tell you, the rice here is so good. We usually have rice with protein of some kind and veggies and obscure fruit. Our ministry hosts mom cooks for us (we call her mommy) and she doesn’t speak any English but talks to us all the time. It’s really funny, because we are just really expressive in order to communicate. But I’ve learned exchanging words is only a fraction of connection with someone. Because I feel like she’s like a grandma to me, yet we have never had a real conversation. In fact, most of our relationship includes acting like fools and laughing uncontrollably. It’s beautiful.

Communion

We have been taking communion every night to remember His sacrifice. Once, it turned into prayer and anointing for each person. Im so grateful for what the Lord is doing on my team. We’ve also made it a space for worship. It’s been so sweet to come together as a team under the Lords love. After all our team name is Nissi (which means the Lord love is a banner over us).

That’s my overdue and extensive update. It’s just been hard to articulate what God is doing. Just know that He is working in Cambodia just as much as He is wherever you are right now. He is faithful!